Let's go back to the 60s. Please? Can we, can we, can we?!? If your my usual crowd of kids from the 80s and 90s, I realize the 60's just ain't your thing, but believe me, today we look at something special. The combination of the two greatest things to ever come out of the 60s: Cereal and music. Now, cereal had been around for some time before the 60s, but it really started kicking off in that decade. It was around that time that cereals started to promote more and more to the starving baby boomers. First, they made their cereals delicious, like a fine crunchy candy. Second, they put in funny looking shapes, like alphabet pieces or nifty marshmallows. Third, they put funny-looking characters on their boxes to catch the eyes of millions of children. Fourth, they put puzzles and games on the back to keep kids occupied while they were eating.

And fifth, most importantly, they added fun little prizes. This was indeed the best aspect of cereal for kids back then, and still is today. Hey, good-tasting food AND a free gift. Sure, most of these gifts tended to brake after the first day, but it's the thought that counts. Now, there was a lot of experimenting in the 60s on what they should put in the boxes. They tried everything from toys that sank and raised in a water like a submarine, toys that looks like submarines, and toys that made sounds like submarines Toys were fine and dandy, but with a rise in rock and roll music, many companies felt they had to tap into this resource. So, they put music in their boxes.

Many companies tried to put small records inside their boxes. While that turned out nicely, many companies thought they had to take it a step forward. They didn't put their records in the boxes, they put them ON the boxes. The records were part of the boxes! To play, one had to cut along the dotted line, find the nearest record player, and listen to that sweet, if not slightly scratchy sound.

Wheaties was the first one to delve into such mediums, with Disney close behind. It was an overnight success. Soon, almost ever cereal company took a shot at making these amazing cardboard records.

Speaking of, cardboard was the main medium on which these records were made. They tended not to be that durable, but were a lot cheaper to make then making real records and sticking them in box. Some of these records were plastic that was actually attached to the cardboard in the box. A lot more durable, but companies couldn't be spendy. Many decided to go both ways and make the records out of cardboard, and then coat them with a thin layer of plastic for protection.

Wow, five paragraphs down, and while I'm having fun writing about this stuff, I realized that I haven't made my usual attempts to be funny. So, to make up for lost time... Eggs are funny. Funny eggs. OBAY THE EGGS!

With the rise of rock and roll, it was Post that decided they need albums of the hottest bands of the time, so rather then produce little kiddy music albums or records of bands no one really gave a damn about, they produced small samplings of the hottest sounds of the time. Take the Monkees for example. For those who don't have a clue who these guys are, despite their recent documentary movie, the Monkees were a fake band that became a real band later on. You see, four actors were recruited to star in a TV show were they would act like a band. They did the vocals for their songs, but weren't allowed to write the lyrics or play any instruments.

Well, near the end of the 60s, they got really pissed, quite the TV show, and started playing music for real, even though they kept the name. Sort of what American Idol does today.

For some strange reason, the records decided to exclude the fourth member of the band, Peter Tork. Maybe because he was considered the hippy of the group, and with troubles in Vietnam, putting a hippy on their boxes and in their records might make it look like Post promotes anti-war. Or maybe they thought they would be promoting drug use if they put him on. Or maybe they just ran out of room.

Following the Monkees came Bobby Sherman, who really wasn't as successful as the Monkees or any of the other bands put on Post cereal, but they needed a scrap goat, and there was Bobby, looking all sexy and stuff. For those unfamiliar with Bobby... well, join the club. I don't know a thing about him. He just jeans. And sung music. He's like a cop now or something. Moving on...

The Jackson Five was another popular band of the time, and was the band that got Michael Jackson his start. I think that's him on the bottom right of the group picture. Damn, has that boy changed. I could go on with a lot of cliche Michael Jackson jokes, but I'm really too good for that. No, I am! Why are you snickering!

Rounding things off was The Archies. Yeah, they made a band off of those guys. They were just like Alvin and the Chipmunks in the sense that they were a band that didn't actually exists, despite their lack of Christmas songs. In fact, it was through these cereal promotions that provided the Archies with most of their record sales. That's right, The Archies owe their existence to cereal. Cereal.

Here's something to give you an idea of the size of these records. Smaller then your average record, which was OK, seeing as cereal companies weren't any more willing then buy the rights for three our four songs. Not the bad cutting job. Many children tried cutting out many of these records by themselves. Like I've said before, kids are terrible with scissors. All the nice-looking records you might still find on the internet were most likely cut out by an adult. Many attempts to cut out a record made by a child usually ended up in totally destroying the record, which usually ended up with the kid crying a lot, which usually ended up with the parents giving in and buy the same cereal again.

Some other groups that made records not shown here included The Banana Splits, which were another fake band, Josie and the Pussycats, ANOTHER fake band, and the Sugar Bears. I have no clue who the Sugar Bears are. Poor me. Poor me. Poor me. Poor me another shot of whiskey.

So, when did all these end? Well, by the late 70s, the record promotion had all but disappeared. LIFE decided to give it one more shot in 1986, which might have been the last time such a promotion was used. The Rock Music Mystery wasn't your usually album-cut-out-of-a-cardboard-box. It was a mystery about the latest rock band that you listened to. I can't quite remember what the hell it was about, some contest thing that ended before I could remember.

In my opinion, 80s music sucked, so that's why I think such a promotion never kicked off with such steam. Besides, few kids actually cared anymore. It was the rise of the CDs, and records were soooooo out-of-date. Thus, no more promotions of such likeness were ever tried again.

Now, I get DVDs in my cereal. Fricken DVDs! Shows you how much we have advanced in the last 40 years. And, um... yeah. This article's over. GO AWAY!

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